Vincent and Shelly Browning walked their 1,600 pound steer, Oliver, into a Petco to test the store’s “all leashed pets are welcome” policy. Though he had to pose for pictures, this dawgie wasn’t disapprovin’.
Don’t try to understand them. Just rope and throw and brand them. Then, bring them to Petco.
When I checked with Patti’s Grooming in the Viking Plaza Mall, I learned the biggest pet they had come through the door was a 40 pound pot-bellied pig. “Anything bigger,” employee Kevin said, “and we’d be taking him next door to the Brass Lantern and having lunch.”
Other creatures great and small with leashes:
Mongo’s mount in Blazing Saddles. His trusty steed didn’t have Watusi horns but did sport a tailgate with the words “yes” and “no.” Being a big believer in social conventions, Mongo parked it outside.
Bees. Does this guy leash the bees knees?
Additional animals on leashes include porcupines and turtles.
Creatures not on leashes that should be:
Along with George W. Bush, I believe the human being and fish can coexist peacefully.
You can also include disc jockeys with keyboards, but that goes without saying.