Store Seeks To Shame Shoppers

When you shop Alexandria first, do you go paper, plastic, or bring your own?

Despite all these cloth bags I have…

And my love of killing things that paper comes from…

I almost always ask for bags that are plastic because I’m, well, evil. Hey, a lot of things you and I buy in a market are already in plastic containers. Even the bags under my eyes are plastic. (It was some kind of weird cosmetic surgery that didn’t come close to what they showed in the brochure. Don’t ask.)

In Vancouver, a grocery store is trying to shame evildoers out of using the plastic menace by putting embarrassing writing on their bags. If a customer of East West Market opts to hate our planet bag-wise, they get charged five cents per plastic bag.  Then, they get saddled with a bag that has an embarrassing slogan on it like “The Colon Care Co-op,” “Dr. Towe’s Wart Ointment Wholesale,” or “The Weird Adult Video Emporium.”

The store printed 1,000 shaming bags, but the promotion has big backfire potential.

Not only are customers leaving their reuseable bags at home and using these cringe-worthy bags for their groceries, they’re buying them as souvenirs.  Nooooo!!

This wouldn’t fly in at least 40 other countries where they have banned or restricted the use of plastic bags. In Kenya, can ya’ believe this–anyone caught making, selling or using a plastic bag faces a fine of $40,000 and up to 4 years in prison.  Take that Dr. Towe.  Next time I go to Nairobi,  please remind me to bring a couple of Alexandria Smiles bags.

When it’s time to rake and bag leaves, I caress Mother Earth and use paper ones.  Are you getting this, Mombasa?

What’s worse than not having a politically correct bag with you? Not having any!

Lots of stores around here play nice and have canvas bags to purchase and use when you buy their things. Does Ron’s Warehouse?  Whether they have a paper or cloth bag option doesn’t matter. I’ll shop Ron’s even if their bags are made out of baby seal skin and bald eagle feathers. Well, maybe not bald eagle feathers. They tickle the bags under my eyes.


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