I was nine years old when Tina Turner’s Private Dancer album came out. I’m so thankful that as a child I was shown such a powerful example of how the second act in a person’s life can be better than the first. Her bravery was inspirational – and the fact that she never shied from telling that story was a huge lesson in overcoming adversity. But there was another lesson in there…
It’s really crappy to offer a compliment and then qualify it.
I remember people talking about Tina’s comeback. How amazing it was that someone at her age could resurrect, and even surpass what she had done earlier in her career.
At her age.
They would also talk about how she looked so good for her age.
For her age.
Her age was 43 and Tina looks great for any age. Just say she looks good.
People do it all the time, “She looks so good for a big girl”, “You have such a pretty face”, “She looks so good for her age”…
Either give the compliment and don’t add that tiny knife twist or keep the compliment to yourself. We were given the ability to have internal monologues for a reason.
I was nine years old and I figured that out, why do some folks still struggle?